Top Ten Reasons the Johnnies Crush the Tommies

Posted by:
Touchdown Tommy
Posted on:
26 October 2007 5:18 pm
  1. Nick Gunderson: This kid eats weak, inexperienced offensive lines for lunch.
  2. Alex Kofoed: 4th year starter is at home, on the turf, and playing his last game against UST. 
  3. Jerry Haugen: Defensive coordinator extraordinaire will have schemes to confuse and baffle the young Tommie offense.
  4. Brian Weber: Speed kills.  That and the combination of great hands, leaping ability, and inexperienced corners spell a big day for the #1 Johnnie WR.
  5. Ryan Wimmer: Middle linebacker is developing into a premier player.  Always seems to be around the ball and making tackles sideline to sideline.
  6. Rich Hall: The biggest Johnnie superfan is watching from the big party in the sky.  Nobody hated the Toms more than Mr. H.
  7. Rat Pak: The Pak will get the Tommies to do something ridiculously stupid and embarrassing all at their own will.  Pay attention it never fails.
  8. Tommie student body: They’ll be too busy socializing and talking about the latest Abercrombie and Fitch winter fashion than to cheer during the game.  Over/under on number of times the “we don’t care about football” is uttered from the Purple mouths is 837.
  9. Don Roney: 0-9 career versus SJU and generally considered the worst coach in the MIAC.  Give the man a lifetime contract.
  10. John Gagliardi: You know John will not allow the team to look past the Tommies as the cardinal and blue await a MIAC title game in 2 weeks against Bethel.  Ordinary players, doing ordinary things, extraordinarily well.